Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Glitter In My Eyes

 Right now I am watching the most corrupt show on television with my mother.  It is no coincidence that Fox hosts it either.  On this show, they take ho-dunk average Americans bearing the vocal chords of marketable angels, and turn them into glammed out, world hunger solving, inspiring idols.  You probably know what show I am referring  by now, and if not, I will tell you -drumroll- American Idol.  Oh god, I wanna barf over the fact that I am watching this, I just wanna bond with my mom, ok? Apparently, (my mother informed me, she has been watching the entire season and is completely into it.) I am watching the elimination round of the top three, and it is tradition in American Idol (they have done it for the past 40 seasons) to show the contestants returning to their home towns and to give a little summary of the contestant's journey through public television.  When they go home they are greeted by thousands of screaming people holding signs saying things like "U R AWESOME" in glitter glue.  They showed close ups of 10 year old girls screaming at the top of their lungs.  When I asked my mom what they were so scared of she laughed and said, "isn't it cute?" What does that mean!? I was disgusted by how obsessive people were over these make-shift pop stars.  Just because they are on TV and are from your home town is no reason to hand over the key to the city.  Quote: "I like him cause he is cute, he has cool glasses and he is from Milwaukee!" Umm. 
But I do have to give American Idol some credit.  They got Alicia Keys on the show to talk about starving children in Africa and ask nicely for her fellow Americans to text and donate 5 dollars to the cause.  THEN to up the Fox reputation one more level, Alicia Keys brings to the stage a young boy from Rwanda to preform "I'm the World's Greatest".  Touching really.  He smiled and danced like a real American.  
They also had some other great guest performers tonight (sense sarcasm).  Jordan Sparks, a previous American Idol winner, sang something about causing wars, how relevant of her.  Kate Perry preformed one of her two hit singles wearing a sexy Elvis inspired swimsuit, there was even confetti.  After that one my mom yelled, "Retarded!" Apparently she didn't like that performance.  Offensive? Maybe, more like awesome. I was just relieved she didn't defend her like she had been defending every other aspect of that fucked up show.  
The end of the show was especially nauseating.  It took about 15 minutes and 5 comercial breaks to announce who was eliminated.  And when they did, they displayed a slow motion collage of clips set to some sappy song, while occasionally showing clips of audience members tearing up, and of course clips of Paula with her makeup dripping down her face onto her coture gown inspired by middle school dance ensemble.  
All in all I feel kinda stupid now, and for some reason I can't get the Ford logo out of my head.